I just don’t feel like I’m old enough to be 24.
I feel like this is the part where Britney Spears starts singing “I’m not a girl, not yet a woman”.
I’m just in that weird stage where I’m still figuring out pretty much everything about life.
Somedays I’m going grocery shopping and paying bills because #grown and #independent.
Other days I’m eating cereal for every meal and calling my dad crying because I don’t know what the heck I’m doing.
WARNING: This is kind of a long post and honestly I’m not sure what I’m doing so enter at your own risk. 🙂
1. If you feel it, say it
I know we filter pretty much everything in life.
Our pictures, our social media accounts, our conversations, but listen up: MEAN WHAT YOU SAY AND SAY WHAT YOU MEAN.
If something or someone makes you feel loved, happy, sad, scared, angry, whatever it is say it.
And if you say it, then mean it because people don’t deserve to be lied to and you don’t deserve to feel like your emotions/opinions don’t matter.
2. Stop caring what other people think
I know I’ve written a lot about this lately, but it’s because it’s something I mega struggled with and I wish that I could have back all that time I wasted caring what other people thought about me.
If you want to start a blog, start a blog.
If you want to wear crazy socks every day, wear crazy socks.
If you want to dye your hair blue, do it.
Go against the grain and do your own thang.
3. Talk to People
Put your electronics down and try having real life, in the flesh, face to face convos.
This is an art of communication that is slowly dying.
Talk to the person doing your nails, the person doing your hair, people you see in grocery stores, heck even have those awkward elevator talks.
Just talk. You never know who you’ll meet and what you might learn.
Like I talked about in my post last week I have zero patience, but the older I get I’m realizing that the best things in life are often the things I had to wait for.
Don’t rush into things and grab at every opportunity, sometimes you’re meant to just be still.
Don’t try to move so fast that you settle for what’s good instead of what’s best.
5. Trust where you’re at
Ahhh which cliche shall I start with?
Lol, Jk I’ll spare you, but seriously trust the process.
So many people (myself included) focus too much on the end game instead of on what’s right in front of them.
Whether you like it or not, this is where you’re meant to be at this moment.
You can’t get to what’s next unless you start enjoying right now.
6. Not everyone will like you
This is a tough pill for someone like me to swallow.
I like when people like me and I’m a people pleaser.
Some people won’t like you and that’s okay.
Be kind anyway.
7. You’re never too cool
Ya know that sign you’ve probably seen in your Aunt Pearl’s kitchen “Dance like no one’s watching, Sing like no one’s listening, Love like you’ve never been hurt”?
Yeah, well do that.
Be ridiculous and let your inner child free.
8. Be childlike
This kind of goes with #7, but try to view the world with a childlike wonder.
Try to start each day with fresh eyes, a clear mind, and an open heart.
You’re never too old to grow.
9. Make time
We make time for the things that are important to us.
Stop blowing off your friends.
Stop making up excuses to get out of family events.
Time is one of those things you can’t get back and trust me you’re going to miss those little things one day.
Use your time wisely.
10. Keep making new friends
No new friends, no new friends, no new friends, no, no new (DJ Khaled!). WE DA BEST!!!!
Sorry, I had to, but seriously you’re never too old or too cool for new friends.
Be inclusive and don’t ever EVER be a Regina George.
Read books, articles, your Bible, anything just read.
Expand the way you think by digesting some knowledge that isn’t your own or already collecting dust in the back of your brain.
Readers are leaders.
12. It’s okay to do that “weird” thing
Sometimes I still get afraid of the dark. Yes, I’m 24, yes I know that’s embarrassing, but I do.
Like any adult, I turn on Disney channel because I know that there won’t be any commercials or movies that might make it hard to sleep *cough cough I’m talking about you The Grudge*.
When I need a good laugh I google The Amanda Show or funny youtube videos.
It’s okay to do those weird things.
You only get one life, live it.
13. Quiet those lies
I’ve realized one of the most destructive things I’ve done to myself is listen to those little lies I tell myself.
The ones that I let creep into my mind and then I run with it.
You know those lies that since I’m thinking them, then that means that everyone else must think them too.
So it must be true right?
And then I confuse lies with reality.
Don’t listen to the voice that tells you you’re, unworthy, less than, unsuccessful, worthless.
You rock and you deserve a cookie.
14. You don’t need anyone’s approval
The only approval you need is from yourself and Jesus.
People will always have something to say.
Stop listening to their voices and start listening to yours.
15. Seek wisdom
This kind of goes with #14, but just because your living for your own approval does not mean that you shouldn’t ask for advice from people older than you (that you trust).
Chances are that your parents, grandparents, pastor, teacher, etc. all have unique stories to share with you from mistakes they’ve made and the wisdom they gained along the way.
Take time to hear them out even if you don’t agree with them.
16. Conquer hurt from your past
If you haven’t dealt with all the things from your past, especially the pain, it WILL resurface over and over again until you do.
You can either deal with it now or deal with it later when it smacks you in the face because the past is like a boomerang.
Trust me, I’m an expert and I suggest you start the healing process ASAP.
17. Love yourself
Love yourself or no one will.
Sound harsh, but it’s the truth.
You can’t love someone else if you don’t even love yourself.
You can try to give away your love and think you’re loving someone only to be left feeling empty because you didn’t really have any love to give away in the first place.
Trust me been there. Done that. Got the tee shirt.
18. If you wonder..
If you wonder if you can be doing something better, you can.
If you wonder if something is wrong, it probably is.
If you wonder if there’s more to life, there is.
19. It’s okay to break off relationships
It’s okay to end relationships that are toxic, leave you feeling empty, or don’t make you a better version of you.
It’s okay to want deeper relationships that nurture your inner spiritual self.
20. Risk it to get the biscuit
Taking a leap of faith can be scary.
I like to think that I can predict the outcomes of situations and if I do everything just right then things will go my way right?
Haha *says WRONGO in the Grinch’s voice*.
Even if I don’t always get “my way”, I’d rather fail and know that at least I tried my best and not wonder “what if”.
I promise you that you won’t ever get whatever “it” is without taking risks.
Keep failing until you find it.
21. Document things
I know we live in the technology age and we do everything for the “gram”, and people can make you feel annoying, but take pictures, take videos just DO IT.
It’s going to be so cool one day to look back and relive those memories.
Trust me, you’ll thank me later.
This may sound a little outdated, but you seriously won’t regret it.
I write EVERYTHING down.
What I care about right now, and what I don’t.
How someone or something made me feel (so don’t cross me or I’ll put you in my burnbook… haha… jk… kind of… you’ll never know).
One day I’m going to look back and be able to see how much I changed, what’s important, and probably crack up at myself.
Write about your life.
23. Laugh at yourself
Hey you, yeah you.
Stop taking yourself so seriously.
It’s okay to mess up.
It’s okay to cut loose.
Laughing is the best calorie burner. 😉
24. Forgive yourself
I saved this one until the end because it’s the longest so skip to the end if you must, but this is the one that was heaviest on my heart.
We’re taught so much about forgiving others, but were never really taught how to forgive ourselves.
This is something that I’ve wrestled with for a long time.
I can forgive others so easily, but when it comes to me and my past, I struggle with letting go.
To the girl I was between ages 19-22, I forgive you.
It’s no excuse, but my 19th birthday was not the best way to kick off a new year.
I spent it in my dying mother’s hospital room.
When we lost her that following February I ached.
I felt cheated.
I felt like life was unfair.
I felt like my family had seen more than anyone should have to.
I felt pain and I felt guilt.
Pain for the obvious reasons, but guilt because I didn’t think I did enough.
I shouldn’t have wasted all those years being a moody teenager pushing her away and fighting her tooth and nail.
I shouldn’t have gone off to school when she was slowly starting the beginning of the end.
I should have shown her just how much I loved her every single day.
I shouldn’t have bottled up my emotions and turned to partying and a new relationship.
I should have run to Jesus instead of any and every distraction, but I didn’t.
And as much as I might wish for a re-do that’s just not how life works.
So I forgive myself.
I forgive myself for the things I cannot change.
To the friends I pushed away and the heartache I caused along the way, I’m sorry.
I forgive myself because I’m human and I’m far from perfect.
25. Always be extra
Be extra like adding #25 when you were supposed to stop at #24.
Go above and beyond and always push for that extra mile.
Sorry for the long post, but if you’re still reading this, then you’re my favorite kind of person 🙂